answering your questions #3: It’s Bongo, Ma’am.
July 27, 2006
This one is really long and complicated because you people are obsessed with some seriously weird stuff. I grouped some of the searches together to save time.
q: what movies has DMX been in
a: who cares.
q: submarine jokes
a: After a thorough 1-minute search, I have deduced that 90% of submarine jokes are uninspired lists comparing submarines to women, 90% of which consist of “going down” references. I did, however, find one good submarine joke that you will want to repeat to your friends at parties:
“How do you sink a submarine?”
“Send a diver to knock on the back door!”
Ha ha! Well done, Paul, aged 9. You are cleverer than submariners in two ways: you write better jokes, and you’ve come up with a cheap way to actually sink a submarine, since judging from the jokes they write themselves, submariners are idiots.
q: “I smell like I sound”
a: Note to self: insert “idiot” joke vis-a-vis submariners, the stench of 50 sailors trapped in a metal canister for weeks at a time here.
q: “bootylicious the movie”, “bootylicious + CNN”
a: Unaware of the existence of either of these projects, I consulted with the real Bootylicious. The answer:
” ‘Bootylicious the movie’ really needs to be made. There will totally be monkeys. I just need to work in some explosions, a sassy minority character, and maybe Robert Patrick.”
q: monkeys
a: Appearing Summer 2007 in Bootylicious the Movie starring Robert Patrick:
Bongo, the Minority Action Adventure Monkey!
q: “it was earth all along” (2 searches)
a: No matter how much you might hope otherwise, it always is, man. It always is.
q: scooby doo sandwich
a: How can I pass up a chance to invent my own sandwich?
How to make a SCOOBY DOO SANDWICH: Mix ginger snaps, Tiny Teddies, chocolatey dog treats, and dog biscuits (crushed for ease of consumption) in a large bowl. Add the contents of a jar of peanut butter (recommended: Extra Creamy Skippy) and mix until the peanut butter has bonded to all ingredients and has congealed into a mass on your spoon. Slap two pieces of bread around it, and eat.
You should have a 50% chance of gaining some kind of magical powers, provided those powers involve projectile vomiting and a frantic trip to the emergency room.
(Kids at home, don’t eat this, seriously, you’ll probably die and wild dogs will eat your remains.)
q: strongest guy on earth
a: Apache Chief. Duh.
q: duran duran hungry like the wolf is awesome
a: correct.
q: Trevor Aiken
a: Do I really need to write another joke for this?
Entry Filed under: Duran Duran, Monkeys, bootylicious, chas, scooby doo, searches. .
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